Happy New Year...Yeah Right.

So far, the New Year just sucks. Beginning with being tricked into taking an into the New Years-missing the flipping fireworks with my boyfriend-shift. What ticks me off the most is that the guy doesnt feel bad at all, I trusted the douche bag. Everyone seemed to have known he was manipulating and that I should have said "no", not only did I feel stupid and sad, Pipe was upset with me as well, so not cool. The jerk didnt even do the prep he promised me and took up all my work space making dough that he was suppose to make at 6 in the morn not 5 in the arvo, half an hour before service so I couldnt do anything. Jerk.

I got home at 6am New Years Day, Pipe came to my work 20mins before the fireworks, not that we saw jack sh..., stupid buildings blocked everything. But I was happy he came, he stayed until the bar closed at 2am and helped me make pizzas. Though he was still pretty upset with me and he was extremely tired.

New Years day - I slept through it, everytime I woke up I just kept feeling really bad and angry at that jerk who tricked me. I pretty much wanted to pig out all day, screw diet, I wanted to just stuff my face with all the junk I could find to make myself feel better, but in the end I stopped myself and went back to sleep....

This morning I woke up thinking, I dont want to be here, I want to be somewhere else. Why didnt I follow my plan and be working overseas right now and not have went through this crap? Sometimes I'm scared. I dont want to be following someone elses dream and regret not doing what I want later. I dont want to hurt anyone but sometimes...I do need to say "no" I need to start saying it more. Next Year after my trip to Vietnam, I'm moving across the pacific, I'm leaving this place for a year and start fresh.

New note: Mental weather today, rain, sun, rain, thunder and sunshine. Though I must admit after the rain clouds had gone and blue skies appeared, the street was glistening from where the sunlight hit wet ground, was quite refreshing. The Rain washed all the crap away...

I took my sister out today to eat and shop. Found this cake shop called "Hello Happy", Korean bakery. I dont usually like going into asian bakeries and patisseries, no matter how super cute and delish they look, they usually taste pretty awful-yet they're so popular (like 85 degrees, to me, one of the worst cakes I've ever had). But the cakes here were pretty and yum! was delightedly surprised, at the price they were I was so glad I wasnt disappointed. Definitely visiting that place again.

I'm starting to collect ideas for creating my own desserts, my deadline is in a week when Pipe and I start experimenting in the kitchen, spending once a week cooking dishes and putting them into a portfolio, should be fun, but a lil stressful at times. I know I have a lot of work to do and most of my desserts will fail the first few times, but thats what I need.

I hope this year will be good to me and things will turn around. Wishing everyone a Happy New Year.

He Loves me, even when he Hates me